Batting Practice

While shopping today, I saw a cute, pink MLB baseball and bat that I couldn't resist picking up for Alexa.  When we were in St. Louis, she had tried a few swings of the bat at my friend Molly's house, so I figured she would enjoy having her own baseball set.  I figured correctly - - Alexa was very excited to see the bat when I picked her up from Aftercare tonight, although she did ask why the Cardinals and Fredbird were not on it.  My brainwashing of her to be a St. Louis fan has worked!  lol

As soon as we walked in the door, Alexa was ready to break open the packaging and head out to batting practice in the backyard.  I have to laugh whenever I'm showing Alexa how to do something, as she never wants me to show her or help her do it.  She likes to figure everything out for herself (little Connie).  We're still working on her timing - she likes to swing as soon as I toss the ball - but she did get a few decent hits.  I think she'll have the hang of it after a couple more practice sessions.  Heck, after our grueling swimming lessons, everything else seems relatively easy!

Baseball - - way more fun than swimming!

Morning Routine

Monday...the return to the normal weekday routine.  There's one component of the weekday routine that always brings a smile to my face - Alexa's wake-up.

Every morning, without fail, Alexa jolts awake (trust me - there's nothing gradual about her wake-up) and immediately comes to find me, yelling "Mommy" in a panicked voice as she searches the house.  I should probably be concerned about this level of anxiety, but it always brings a smile to my face to know that I am always the first thought on her mind in the morning.  It's extremely important to her that she sees me before I leave for work, giving her a hug and kiss.  This morning I knew I had reached a new status echelon, as she didn't even asked me to pause her television show, her one show of the day, when she said good-bye to me.

I will continue to smile at this morning routine as long as it lasts; I have a feeling she won't be begging for a hug and a kiss when I'm dropping her off at middle school :)

Two girls enjoying our Dunkin' Donuts beverages - coffee and hot chocolate.

Return of Summer

Wow - summer has come quickly for those of us in Arizona.  The days of highs in the 80's seem to be in the past, as today's high approached 100-degrees.  Ahh, summer in the desert.

Now that Alexa is enrolled in a Saturday morning swim class, our Sundays are now lesson-free, giving us an entire day without any commitments. Yeah!  Alexa and I made the best of the high temperatures by taking a swim in the pool this afternoon, much of which was spent floating around on a raft in the pool.  She also seemed to be enjoying her "My Little Pony" kickboard, although she uses it more like a boogie board than a kickboard.  Oh well, she was having fun in the water, so that's all that really matters.

I was watching a show on HGTV today, and the network was running a promo that consisted on a montage of viewer-submitted photos of families and their homes.  One of the pictures tat flashed across the screen was a photo of a newborn baby in a knitted stocking.  Alexa, who was drawing in her sketchbook on the floor, immediately yelled, "Granty!  Look, Mommy!  Granty was on tv!"  I felt terrible breaking the news to her that it wasn't a picture of Granty, but rather another baby.  The baby really didn't look too much like Grant, but I think it is yet another demonstration of how much Alexa thinks about her baby brother.  Similar to the rest of us, Granty is never far from her thoughts - he'll always be "the cutest little baby ever" in the eyes of his big sister.

Granty made sure his sister shared the spotlight with him,
even if it meant having to push her out of the way :)

You've Got a Friend In Me

The "Toy Story" movie has been in my car's dvd player for several weeks, and the movie has played on a continuous loop.  As a result, the song "You've Got a Friend In Me" has been stuck in my head, and Alexa's also serenaded me with it several times.

As part of my unrelenting attempt to get Alexa to learn to swim, today she had an 8:30am swim lesson with a new coach - Coach Steven.  She had her normal anxiety and tears, but Steven was pretty stern with her, a style that actually seemed to work for Alexa (fingers are crossed!).  Jenny, BFF Gabriella's mom, had texted me this morning to let me know that Gabriella was going to be doing a make-up swim class at 9am.  I did not tell Alexa about this, as I knew she wouldn't be able to focus on swimming if she knew her BFF was in the viewing area.  When Alexa saw Gabriella, her reaction was truly priceless!  The girls were so excited to see each other, and they were fervently waving to each other and blowing kisses across the pool.  Spending eight hours, five days a week is not enough for these two!

These girls really do have a wonderful friendship.  Based upon some of the stuff Alexa says to me and Gabriella mentions to Jenny, I know that Alexa has talked a lot to her BFF about the loss of Granty.  Even though they're barely four years-old, it's pretty remarkable to see the depth of their friendship and the issues these girls have tackled together.  However, it only takes a quick fight about sharing or a hair-pulling incident to remind me that these girls are only four (or almost four)... :) lol

As I was washing dishes tonight, Alexa was playing outside as Alstott was roaming the yard.  When I looked out the back wall of windows on the house, I saw a very sweet moment, as Alstott and Alexa sat next to each other on the window ledge, simply staring at the sunset over the back ravine.  A girl and her dog..... "Alstott" was Alexa's first word (confusing everyone at her Montessori school in New Jersey), so the friendship with these two should come as no surprise.

Sharing the love with Alstott....

Deep thoughts for a puggle and preschooler.

Artwork for an Angel

Friday is normally the highlight of Alexa's week - it's pizza day at school, and it also means that Mommy brings home a "Mr. Jim's cookie."  One of the guys in my office, Jim (who grew up in a bakery family), makes amazing chocolate chip cookies and brings them to work every Friday; I always make sure to snag one for Alexa.  However, I worked in a different office than my usual one today, so I wasn't able to bring home a "Mr. Jim's cookie" for Alexa.  Instead, we went to Safeway and I let Alexa pick out the cake mix and icing so that we could make cupcakes tonight.  Not one of Jim's famous cookies, but not a bad substitute :)

As we were making the cupcakes, Alexa began to ask me about angels.  Alexa asked what exactly an angel is and where angels live.  Wow - talk about being caught off-guard.  I tried my best to provide concise answers for her questions and also tried to discover what prompted these thoughts.  I still don't know exactly what triggered these questions, but I was able to surmise that someone told Alexa that Granty is an angel now.  Alexa ended the conversation by asking if she could send a card to an angel, as she had a picture she made for Granty.  :)

Granty's a popular guy for artwork these days.  Our friends Keith and Jen sent us a picture of the Relay for Life luminaria that their daughter Caroline, who is one year older than Alexa, decorated in honor of Granty.  Our little boy's legacy continues....

My little baker....funfetti cupcakes w/chocolate icing.

Grant's luminaria - his light continues to shine.
Thank you House family!

Five Months....

Five very long months....

Since we haven't been to Fresno since the funeral, Damon and I have not yet ordered a headstone for Granty's grave.  While Damon was out of town, we received some information and sample designs from the funeral home, but I could not bring myself to open the envelope.  Our procrastination not only been logistical, but it's also intentional; there's a sense of finality when the headstone is complete.  This task is really sad, and it is even tougher to figure out how to create a lasting tribute to our little boy.  I know how long it takes me to design party invitations, so I can only imagine the duration (and number of drafts) of this undertaking.  One thing is for certain - our Granty's headstone will include a giraffe....

There's not a day, or even an hour for that matter, that goes by that I don't think about my Granty.  So many aspects of my life were Granty-centric, I think I'm still adjusting to life without him five months later.  The sadness has been exhausting, but Damon and I are definitely ready to start thinking of our next chapter, one of joy and preservation of Granty's legacy.

One dearly missed little guy....

Halloween In April?

I wish I had a better, more glamorous excuse for not updating the blog last night, but fatigue got the best of me.  When I was washing dishes, I heard Alexa crying out in her sleep, so I ventured into her room to make sure she was okay.  She asked me to lay down with her for a little bit....big mistake.  I fell asleep next to her and didn't wake up until 12:30am.  Needless to say, when I made my way to my own room, the last thing I wanted to do was log onto the computer...

Damon has been out of town for a couple of days, so Alexa has been keeping me very busy.  Her energy levels are truly astounding!  Our car rides to and from school are some of the most entertaining, and enlightening, experiences.  I absolutely love hearing her mind at work - it's so funny to hear some of her thoughts.  Tonight she was busy planning our family Halloween costumes - - I have no idea why, but it was of the utmost importance to her to establish the plan for a holiday six months away.  In Alexa's dream world, the Hovey clan is dressed up like Barbie's "Princess and the Pop Star."  Alexa wil be the Pop Star, she wants me to wear a Princess costume and Damon as the Prince.  Interesting idea, but the likelihood of it happening is about zero. :)  I'm sure she will have hundreds of ideas and change her mind many times before Halloween.  Besides, I don't really see Damon as "The Prince" type.  :)

Regardless of this year's Halloween costumes, I think Halloween 2012 will always be one of my favorites.  The Year of Superman and the Mermaid will always have a special place in my heart....

Our real-life Superman....no costume required.

Grocery Challenge

Well, tonight's swimming lesson was an epic failure, as he couldn't even get up enough nerve to jump to me a few feet from the wall.  I'll attribute the regression to the fact it was a Monday; both Alexa and I were wiped out tonight.  I was prepared to make ravioli for dinner tonight, but I happily complied with Alexa's request for peanut butter and jelly (with a side of homemade kale chips to add some nutritional value) for dinner tonight instead....

After the playground on Saturday, Damon was already at work, so I took Alexa to the grocery store with me for what I thought would be a pretty quick trip.  Not quite.  As we entered the store, I quickly realized that Alexa had been crafting her own shopping list, largely influenced by her classmates' lunches and snacks. It was quite the challenge to listen to her describe the items as I would try to correctly guess what she was trying to explain.  Surprisingly, I know my snacks and junk food pretty well.  Alexa was getting frustrated as I ix-nayed most of her requests.  I asked her what was wrong with the snacks and lunches I pack for her, and she told me, "Your food is too healthy, Mommy.  I want to grow up big and strong, but I would still like to have special treats."  

Damon and I know how lucky we are to have a child who tries new foods, and she usually does eat all of the fruits and vegetables packed in her lunchbag.  As we left Fry's grocery store, I think both of us felt we had achieved a good compromise, as I bought her only one special treat - - cheese and dipping crackers just like BFF Gabriella.  I don't think the homemade kale chips would be nearly as cool.... :)

My little foodie...

A Battle of Wills

Alexa's progress at swimming was very short-lived at only a couple of sessions; since then, she has been regressing and she has seemingly become more petrified of the water.  I think these bi-weekly swimming lessons have become nearly as painful for me as they are for Alexa, as I sit in the viewing space watching Alexa become a contortionist to ensure she has a firm grip on her coach at all times.  Today was no different than any other lesson, as I watched Alexa figure out every way possible not to swim, and poor Coach Nick didn't even try to push it.

I was becoming more and more frustrated as the lesson dragged on, so I talked to the manager about switching coaches to one who would be a little tougher on Alexa.  I also decided that I was going to become her own tough love coach this afternoon in our swimming pool at home.  Shortly after lunch while Alexa was playing in her sandbox, I changed into my swimsuit and hopped into the pool.  Alexa, of course, wanted to join me, but she had no idea what she was in for this afternoon....

Unlike past times when we've been in the pool, I refused to carry Alexa around in the water this afternoon, telling her that she needed to swim to me if she wanted to leave the pool steps.  This was obviously not a popular stance, leading to a couple of meltdowns and one tantrum, but I refused to cave.  I also implemented "No crying by the pool" and "No holding onto my neck" rules which were equally unpopular.  So much for swimming being fun and relaxing!  We went back and forth for way too long, but finally a breakthrough.  After an hour or so, I finally convinced her to let go a swim to me.  A real miracle!  I upped the ante a bit by promising her a surprise if she continued to swim without holding onto me, and sure enough, she did it another five times or so.  Whew!

I did run to Target tonight to buy her a Melissa & Doug Fashion Fun Stencil set, but that was a small price to pay for the breakthrough I've been awaiting for months.  I knew the time was worthwhile when she asked to go swimming again tonight after dinner.  As much as I really didn't want to get back in the pool, I had to oblige and ride this wave of confidence she finally has.  I have already forewarned Alexa that we will be practicing this every night, but surprisingly she seems excited to do it.  Fingers crossed that the momentum continues....I cannot do these standoffs on a regular basis!  (For the record, Connie - 1, Alexa - 0).  lol

Alexa's first time in a pool - - 6-months old.

...and three and a half years later.  :)
(Not today's photo - wasn't smiling too much initially.)

The Look

After a busy morning at gymnastics and a playdate at the playground, Alexa told me multiple times this afternoon that she was tired.  She asked me if she could watch an extra television show, so I turned on an episode of "My Little Pony" in my bedroom, hoping she would fall asleep.  About 45 minutes passed, so I assumed Alexa had fallen asleep after the half-hour show.  I went into the bedroom, expecting to turn off the television, and instead of being sound-asleep on the bed, Alexa was curled up with Damon's iPad watching an episode of "Modern Family."  Knowing she was caught in the act of something she wasn't supposed to be doing, Alexa shot me a look that was identical to one I give - - upward eyes coupled with a furrowed eyebrow.  I couldn't help but laugh - I felt like I was reprimanding myself!

It was another day of great weather here in Arizona, so after Alexa went to bed tonight, Alstott (my loyal puggle) and I enjoyed some time outside on the back patio.  As I sat on the couch, all I could think about were the hours I spent on that same couch with Granty.  Since his exposure to public places was so limited, I would take him outside whenever I could, whether it was just holding him while he slept on my chest or playing with my vivacious and happy little boy.  Although Alstott is quite the snuggler, it's definitely not the same.  I really miss my Granty....

The Look....Alexa version.

Precious moments on the couch.

Definite Mommy's Girl

If I ever need an esteem boost, I need to look no further than Alexa to get a little boost.  She's definitely been on a Mommy kick over the past few weeks, waking up early to make sure she sees me and wanting me to do everything with her.  I'm not sure what's causing the Mommy-centric behaviors, but it's very flattering and I'm sure short-lived.

This morning I drove Alexa to school, and she was thrilled that I was taking her; you would have thought a rock star was taking her.  She was trying to eek out as many hugs and kisses as she could from me as I was dropping her off in the school's carline, and finally her teacher had to physically pull her out of the car so we didn't cause a traffic jam in the parking lot.  What a great way to start the day!

Over the course of the school year, Alexa was very disappointed that I was never able volunteer for her classroom's Park Day.  Obviously the first half of the school year was not an option because of everything going on with Granty, and the Park Days during second semester have always coincided with Executive meetings at work.  However, I think I finally have a chance to redeem myself.....  When I picked up Alexa from Aftercare, she handed me an invitation for Mom's Day at her school on May 2nd.  She begged, "Please please please can you come to my school that day!?!"  There was no way I could say know to her request; I will definitely be clearing my calendar that morning. :)

My little BFF.

Precious Child

I've been a bit behind on my e-mails lately, so tonight I had a few moments to catch-up, and I noticed an e-mail from my sister-in-law Carolyn.  The title of the e-mail, "A Song that Touched Me" immediately caught my eye, as Carolyn has an amazing musical talent.  Carolyn was gracious enough to sing at my wedding as well as Grant's funeral.  Damon's friend Darren, who's a talent agent and was a groomsman in our wedding, was ready to sign Carolyn on the spot when he heard her sing for the first time at our wedding rehearsal.

Carolyn was reading the blog of another family who lost a child, and a link on the family's blog led to a beautiful song.  The words could not be a more poignant representation of the emotions I feel after losing my Granty....

Here's a link to the lyrics and the song if you'd like to listen (click on the "Precious Child" link at the top of the page to play the song), although the vocalist is definitely not "Carolyn-caliber. :)  Precious Child

Precious Child   by Karen Taylor-Good

In my dreams

You are alive and well

Precious child, precious child

In my mind

I see you clear as a bell

Precious child, precious child

In my soul there is a hole

That can never be filled

But in my heart there is hope

'Cause you are with me still

In my heart you live on

Always there, never gone

Precious child you left too soon

Though it may be true that we're apart

You will live forever in my heart

In my plans

I was the first to leave

Precious child, precious child

But in this world

I was left here to grieve

Precious child, precious child

In my soul there is a hole

That can never be filled

But in my heart there is hope

'Cause you are with me still

In my heart you live on

Always there, never gone

Precious child you left too soon

Though it may be true that we're apart

You will live forever in my heart

God knows I want to hold you

See you, touch you

Maybe there's a heaven

And someday I will again

Please know you're not forgotten until then

In my heart you live on

Always there, never gone

Precious child you left too soon

Though it may be true that we're apart

You will live forever in my heart

My precious child

Fashionista

Before I leave for work each morning, I try to make sure I lay out Alexa's outfit for the day.  Damon can put together a suit and tie combination better than anyone, but when it comes to casual-wear, especially girls', he struggles to put together a coordinated look.  Alexa's school also has a "No Licensed Characters" policy that  sometimes adds to the complexity of choosing an outfit.

Today I had a feeling Alexa was not going to be too happy about the outfit I had picked for the day - a turquoise scooter skirt with a plain white t-shirt.  Alexa typically gravitates towards anything that sparkles or twirls, so I knew my outfit didn't rank high on those criteria.  Sure enough.  When I talked to Damon later this morning, he mentioned that Alexa requested a t-shirt change before she left for school.

On our way home from school tonight, Alexa politely mentioned that she did not like the plain white shirt I had picked out for her; she told me it was too boring.  "Mommy, could you please never make me wear that plain shirt again?  I'm asking you nicely!"  Oy... if we're dealing with this at four years-old, I can only imagine what her teenage years will be like!

The be-dazzled mermaid costume was exactly what she wanted.
If only she could wear this daily....

One of Those Days...

When I picked up Alexa from Aftercare, interrupting an art project on which she was working, I knew it was going to be a long night ahead.  Alexa was not too happy to see me, as it meant an abrupt end to her arts and crafts.  She's been waking up early to make sure she sees me before I leave for work (I had a few 6am departures in the past few weeks), which leads to a very tired girl by 6pm.  Tonight was one of those nights when fatigue seemed to get the best of her.  When I wouldn't allow her to eat a full bag of M&M's (an Easter treat from Nana Hovey) for her daily sweet allowance, she had a complete meltdown on the floor...I knew instantly that the issue was much more than that of a portion of M&M's.

Sure enough, when I was holding a sobbing Alexa and asking her what was wrong, she tearfully proclaimed, "I miss my Granty.  He was the cutest thing I've ever seen, but he died, and now I can't see him anymore."  It's moments like these that break my heart, and I have to summon every ounce of strength I have to keep myself composed.  I reiterated to Alexa that I too miss Granty and think about him all of the time, but I keep him close in my heart all of the time.  Alexa seems to understand the concept of holding Granty's memory in our hearts, but tonight she said, "I know, but I just wish he could come back for just one day so I could see him again."  Cue the tears...

Just as Damon and I are still learning to adapt to a daily grieving process, I think Alexa's doing the same.  I know we have a long road ahead and a lifetime that will be peppered with the good days and the sad days, but I truly believe we will get through these extremely tough times and have joyous days ahead.  After all, we have a great angel on our side watching over us.

There's no denying the mutual love and admiration with these two.
Check out his grip on her dress.... :)

10+2 = 49

What a sad day - the tragedy at the Boston Marathon is truly beyond comprehension.  I think back to last week at the half marathon in St. Louis and the excitement that was in the final stretch of the run and at the finish line.  It's hard to imagine that someone would intentionally destroy the euphoria of the finish.  My thoughts and prayers are with all of those affected by this horrific event.

In a bit of lightheartedness, Damon had the night off of work and was gracious enough to prepare dinner for the family.  As the three of us sat around the dinner table, Alexa began to show off some of her counting and number skills.  She held up her two hands and counted her ten fingers, but when I did the same and asked her how many fingers I was holding up, she gave her standard, "I dunno" answer.  Then, she said, "But I do know 10+2."  What!?!  I told Damon, "If she knows this, I am going to have a heart attack."  She convincingly replied, "10 + 2 is 49."  She said it so matter-of-factly, I think both Damon and I did a double-check of our own math...  Child prodigy?  Not likely, but there's no doubt Alexa provides the much-needed comic relief in our family.  Our dinner conversations would be a lot less lively without our future mathematician.

With a mom in Finance, you can bet we'll keep working on numbers :)

Wheels with Meaning

Given the craziness of the past few weeks, not to mention some terrible nights of sleep (not quite sure why), Damon and I decided a long-overdue family day would be a great way to "celebrate" our anniversary.  My how our lives have changed since our Hawaii anniversary trip - I think that was our second or third anniversary.  However, while watching 'The Amazing Race' tonight, Damon decided a trip to Bora Bora is a must-do after our kids are in college.

Alexa asked to go to the playground early this afternoon, and since it was absolutely beautiful outside, I was more than happy to indulge her request.  I think both of us were pleasantly surprised when Damon wanted to join us!  The playground is at the main entrance to our community, so Alexa hopped on her bike to make the short trip there.  As she rode ahead of me, I some pangs of sadness thinking about the history of her bike.  It was her gift from Granty after he was born (Yes, who knew that newborn babies brought bikes with them?), and he "gave" it to her on the day we came home from the hospital.  We hadn't adjusted the seat in the time she's had the bike, and running behind her, you could see how much she has grown in the past ten months.  When she first received the bike, her feet could barely reach the pedals, and now we definitely need to raise the seat to accommodate her leggy frame.

When Damon and I were deciding the sibling gift from Granty to Alexa, we had a lot of choices, and I am very glad we opted for one with longevity.  This is the bike on which Alexa's going to learn to ride without training wheels, endure a few spills and race around the neighborhood.  I'm sure it will be a source of fond memories - - who doesn't remember his/her first bike!?!  Alexa's bike will just have an extra-special association... :)

Enjoying her new bike on the day Granty came home from the hospital.

Worth the Wait

After Easter and the weekend in St. Louis, it was nice to return to our normal Saturday routine.  Alexa was up bright and early this morning (6:05am - ugh!), so I had time to make pancakes for breakfast before we headed to gymnastics.  The gym is a lot less stressful than swimming, as I enjoyed my Dunikn' Donuts coffee and Women's Health Magazine during her hour-long lesson.  No need to watch for meltdowns at gymnastics!

With the craziness of the past few weeks - my workload, travel, weekday make-up lessons for Alexa - I had become very lazy about preparing dinner.  We enjoyed more than our share of ready-made meals and the normal Thursday night Chick-Fil-A (grilled, of course).  I decided to step it up a bit today, so I prepared a pork loin and asparagus for dinner.  Normally, Alexa is not a huge fan of pork, but I had a secret weapon to ensure Alexa would eat her meal....dessert!

Alexa's allowed one sweet per day, so she meticulously plans her one indulgence for the day.  She also closely monitors what I eat and has no problem making sure I abide by the one sweet policy too (I did sneak a few pretzel M&M's today when she was in the playroom).  Today at the grocery store, I picked up an angel food cake and strawberries, the perfect summer dessert, and I knew when Alexa was asking me about dinner at 3pm that she was excited for this one.

She gobbled up the pork and asparagus, showing me how big her muscles were getting because of the meal, and she was eager for dessert.  There was a can of whipped cream left over from NeNe's visit (not a normal Hovey household item), so that proved to be an added bonus with the cake and strawberries.  Alexa had a blast making her dessert, and of course, reapplying whipped cream after each bite; I think she must have consumed at least half a can!  She was laughing hysterically with every bite, which was making me laugh even harder.  Her laughter was priceless...Who knew a simple dessert would create this wonderful moment?!? :)

Hard at work extracting the whipped cream.

More whipped cream than strawberries!
(Yes - she wore her leotard all day...don't ask).

A Day in the Park

Friday....Thank goodness!  Although it was a very short week, this weekend could not come soon enough.

I knew it was going to be a relatively quite evening, as Alexa looked exhausted when I picked her up from Aftercare.  Today was the final Park Day of the school year for her and her classmates, and it appeared she must have played full bore in the outdoors today.  Her fatigue didn't prevent her from nagging me during the drive home; she was very disappointed that I never volunteered as a parent-helper for Park Day.  I explained to her that the Park Days conflicted with my work schedule and important meetings (today was a quarter-close review) this year, but I am definitely on hook for volunteering next school year!  It's flattering that she wants me there; I don't think she'll be as enthusiastic when I volunteer to chaperone dances when she's in middle school ;)

Just as Alexa's class has taken advantage of the beautiful weather, the Infant classroom at her Montessori school has been doing the same.  Each night when I pick up Alexa, the children from the Infant room are usually spending time outside on a group stroller ride or toddling around the schoolyard.  It always makes me a little sad and wistful to see Granty's classmates, and it's even tougher when Alexa interacts with them.  Tonight one of the new walkers in the class walked towards Alexa and reached for her lunchbox as we headed out of the campus.  Alexa, of course, was extremely gentle with the little girl and sweetly kissed the top of her hand as she pulled back her lunchbag.  It's the simple moments like this that hit me the hardest - if only.....  

My little guy enjoying an afternoon outside...

WGWH (Wish Granty Was Here)

This week has been one filled with a lot of mentions of Granty from Alexa...I think he's been on her mind a bit more than normal this week.  There's no doubt how much she misses "her cute little baby."  

When Alexa and I were flying out of Lambert Airport in St. Louis, the entrance to the "C" concourse was decorated with floor-to-ceiling posters highlighting some of the landmarks in the city.  Alexa was very excited to see an image of the Cardinals playing at Busch Stadium, and she stopped in front of it to make sure I noticed the picture of the baseball.  She looked two images to the right, and she was ecstatic to see a poster representing the St. Louis Zoo.  Wouldn't you know...of all the animals in the zoo, the image on the picture was a beautiful, but simple, shot of a giraffe.  Alexa exclaimed, "Look Mommy!  Granty's right next to the Cardinals...he'd be so happy!"  Aww....

This morning, Alexa was joking that Damon and Alstott both had babies in their tummies (she's going to give poor Damon a complex), and she suddenly laid her head on my stomach and said, "I miss Granty."  We all do, kiddo.  Like in the St. Louis airport, the signs of Granty our everywhere, but even more powerful are the constant remembrances in our hearts.  

Always on our minds...this is one bond that will never be broken.

The Gambler

Tonight was a long day at work and school for Alexa and myself (I didn't pick her up until nearly 6pm), and the two of us were exhausted tonight.  By 7:30, she was asking me to get her ready for bed, and I was more than happy to lay in bed with her for a little bit.  We were definitely spoiled by our long weekend in St. Louis!

While at my parent's home in St. Louis, Alexa noticed a picture of her cousin Mara with NeNe, as they played scratcher lottery tickets together.  Alexa was very intrigued with the picture and the concept of the scratcher tickets, so my mom purchased a few tickets for the two to play together.  Well, she's hooked!  Tonight Alexa lamented how much she missed NeNe and Papa, and then she proceeded to ask me if we could go out and buy some scratcher tickets.  Apparently she had also mentioned the scratchers to Damon this morning, and he didn't realize she was actually referring to the lottery tickets.  When I mentioned it to him tonight, a huge smile broke on his face....a little gambler, a girl after his own heart.  I have a feeling Damon's going to be playing the lotto with Alexa on a fairly regular basis, and he'll be mentally planning her first trip to Vegas each time :)

Alexa with her scratchers mentor, NeNe.  haha

Eight Years!

Damon and I celebrated our eighth wedding anniversary today.  It's hard to believe it's been eight years since our wedding, an event my friend Kathryn, who was a bridesmaid in our wedding, was still talking about as we ran the half-marathon on Sunday.  It was truly a memorable event!

Damon and I met during my sophomore year of college, as he was on the Purdue Trap and Skeet team with a guy who lived upstairs from me.  Damon was the "California cool" guy who did things his own way (he had his own glassware at a campus bar for cripe's sake), and he had an aura about him that made people want to be around him...including myself.  I never would have expected the guy, who "wasn't my type" and was "just a good friend," would be by my side sixteen years later, enduring some of the best and worst moments of our lives together.

There's no doubt that the past year encompassed a lot of those bad moments - I think we have lived every parent's worst nightmare.  However, through the sadness, despair, anxiety and grief, we have become a stronger couple, and I believe Granty's life will have a lasting impact upon our marriage for the rest of our lives.

Damon worked today, so I'm looking forward to celebrating our anniversary on Sunday.  Damon's always had a knack for buying me great accessories, and he surprised me this morning with a beautiful new Louis Vuitton handbag and wallet.  Suddenly those two St. Louis Cardinals t-shirts and souvenir cup I brought home with me didn't seem so impressive....lol.  In all seriousness, I am a very lucky girl, and I'm looking forward to celebrating many anniversaries in the years to come.

We've come a long way from our days at Purdue!

Home Opener

It was another day of beautiful weather in St. Louis today, so while I was at Target this morning, I picked up a Disney Princess scooter for Alexa to leave at NeNe and Papa's house.  Needless to say, Alexa was ecstatic to see the scooter (she's been asking for one for nearly a year), and she took off zipping down the sidewalk as soon as Papa and I completed its assembly.  Alexa's spent a lot of time with her grandparents, and their undivided attention, this weekend, so I think tomorrow morning's flight back to Phoenix will be a rude awakening.

Today was a quintessential St. Louis day for me - - Imo's Pizza for lunch, a MetroLink ride to Busch Stadium, Cardinals Home Opener followed by Paddy O's, and ending the day with Ted Drewes for dessert. It really does not get much more St. Louis than that!  The home opener, my first one, was a lot of fun - it would have been even more fun had the game ended after seven innings...the bullpen completely imploded tonight.  Nevertheless, it was a fun afternoon with friends and baseball in my beloved St. Louis!

Alexa and I have a very early (7am) flight back to Phoenix tomorrow morning, and then the two of us will have an entire day to relax and get back into the normal routine.  We've had a phenomenal time in St. Louis, and this trip was a much-needed break for me, but unfortunately all good things must come to an end.  Besides, we do miss Damon and Alstott too.... :)

Representing our Cardinals....

Enjoying a scooter ride around the neighborhood with NeNe and Papa.

Mission Accomplished!

We did it!  The eight of us who embarked on the St. Louis Half Marathon completed it today, and it seemed that each of us achieved the personal goals (mine was to make sure I was sub 2-hours...mission accomplished at 1:56) that we had set for the day.  Not too shabby!  I think a few of us were a bit surprised at the hilliness of the course; I might have altered my training plan a bit had I realized how hilly the course would be.  Oh well - I know for next year.  My knees are not too happy with me tonight, but I'm very proud of all of us who participated....I know my little boy would be proud as well.

After the race, there was nothing that sounded more appealing than a nap.  Last night, knowing I was waking up at 4:30am, I did not sleep very well at all....I kept checking the clock and doing a mental countdown to my alarm.  Ugh.  Needless to say, when I came home from the half-marathon this afternoon, I took a shower and immediately took a nap.  A rousing game of Hungry Hungry Hippos between Papa Niehoff and Alexa's didn't even phase my sleep - I was exhausted!

While I was at the race today, Alexa definitely enjoyed her morning with Papa and NeNe, taking advantage of the gorgeous weather in St. Louis today.  After providing the rundown of the morning activities, she  was very proud to announce that she was no longer afraid of worms (I never even knew she was afraid)!  My mom told me they spotted a worm, and after a little bit of prodding ad assurance that it would not bite her, Alexa picked it up and held it.  She was examining the elasticity of the worm and accidentally pulled it into two.  Yuck!  Needless to say, when she asked me to help her look for more worms this afternoon, I happily passed the request onto Papa.

Alexa playing with a worm for the first time...eww!

Carbo Loading

After a delayed landing last night (around midnight...hence the non-update of the blog yesteday), Alexa and I have enjoyed our first day in St. Louis....I know Damon wishes he were here.  While I was running errands this morning, Alexa raided NeNe and Papa's basement; the Barbies, Calico Critters and My Little Pony toys were littering the floor when I returned home.  It was extremely windy today, so my sister Karen had the great idea to pull some of the kites out of the basement.  This was the first time Alexa has ever flown a kite (maybe I need to buy one for the next haboob in Phoenix), and after her initial frustration that the kite wasn't staying in the air, she got the hang of flying it and had a blast.  She was so proud that she was able to fly the kite all by herself!  I saw a smile creep onto my Mom's face as Alexa boasted about her independent flight...little Connie.

My friend Molly hosted an Italian dinner tonight, and she didn't disappoint with the two varieties of lasagna she prepared.  It was absolutely delicious, and Alexa scarfed it down like she hadn't eaten in days.  It was a great chance to see everyone who's running the half marathon tomorrow morning (eight of us), as well as some of our official cheerleaders who will be rooting for us with signs rather than running the race (the smart ones...haha).  Wish us luck for the run bright and early tomorrow morning.  I just want to make my little boy proud!

The 80's are back.!  The pic doesn't do it justice,
but this shirt is the brightest, pink neon I've ever seen....

Ready for a Getaway

Granty's 10-month birthday yesterday really hit me hard.  After yesterday, we'll be celebrating more monthly milestones without him than we had with him.  Hard to believe...

However, I think this long weekend in St. Louis will be the perfect remedy my current doldrum.  In addition to the time I get to spend with my parents and sister Karen, I will have a lot of quality time with my friends in St. Louis.  A pre-race dinner (no cooking for me - - just bringing a salad!), the half-marathon, Cardinals Opening Day.....  Alexa was disappointed tonight to find out that she wasn't going to be running with me; she can do a 1/2 mile run with me no problem, but I think 13.1 miles might be a little too much.  However, she quickly perked up when she realized she would have NeNe and Papa Gene's (no longer Papa Niehoff) basement for entertainment.  The assortment of Barbies, Calico Critters, Fisher-Price play sets, etc... are way more fun than running!

Tomorrow is going to be one busy day - - a full-day of work/school and then a evening flight that lands in St. Louis at 11:30pm.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Alexa sleeps on the plane.... 

SWIM UPDATE - Since Alexa's going to miss gymnastics class on Saturday, she had another Thursday of back-to-back gymnastics and swimming lessons.  Gymnastics, as usual, went great, but swim continues to be problematic.  She is truly petrified of Coach Anthony letting go of her in the pool.   She has made a friend in her Thursday class, Lauren (who's a great swimmer), so that's a positive out of the situation.  When we get back from St. Louis, I think I'm going to go back to the drawing board with the managers of the swim school to derive a new plan to help her overcome this fear....

My boy....

Happy 10-Month Birthday!

It's hard to believe today is my little boy's 10-month birthday....it's still crushing to wake up each morning without him.  We're definitely missing out on a very fun age with Granty.

The reminders of Granty are everywhere.  Like most new parents, I provided information to formula and diaper companies, which let to many coupons on those pricey items.  I used to look forward to those envelopes from Similac and Pampers in the mail or the online offers sent via e-mail.  However, after losing a child, those same direct marketing campaigns can be an intrusive reminder of what I've lost.  The Pampers newsletter, "Your Baby at 10 Months," evoked a sense of sadness as I glanced at all of the milestones that I would normally be expecting to see.  Instead, I will always have my little boy frozen in time at five-months old.

Happy 10-Months, Granty!  I'd give anything to see him pulling himself up or taking his first steps. :(

Happy 10-months, Granty!

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

Tonight we had a Hovey family outing, including my cousin-in-law Glenn visiting from St. Louis, and went to the Diamondbacks-Cardinals game in Phoenix.  As the norm for a transplant-heavy area like Phoenix, there were a lot of Cardinals fans in attendance.  The guy sitting next to us, a St. Louis fan, was very impressed when Alexa began to recite the line-up and knew which player was next to bat.  We were not able to stay for the whole game (Cards won!), but Alexa was able to cheer a go-ahead home run by the Cardinals in the sixth inning.  It was a great evening and a wonderful time at the ballpark!  Alexa held up really well, even sharing her treats (Cracker Jack) with Glenn and Damon...although she did ration their portions to five pieces each. :)

At Chase Field, they don't have a costumed-mascot, but rather four giant-headed characters representing legendary D-back players....the closest thing that I can use to describe these characters are the famous Sausage Races in Milwaukee.  Alexa's fear of life sized characters or people in costumes is not reserved for Santa Claus - - she was petrified of these giant heads, even when they were clear across the stadium.  They are a bit freaky, but Alexa curled up in a ball on my lap, and her pulse was racing like a monster had just come in the room.  Thankfully they didn't come in the section where we were sitting; otherwise, I think she would have had a nervous breakdown.  Poor thing!  I can guarantee Alexa will never request a clown for her birthday party...lol.

GIRAFFE UPDATE:  Yesterday, the LEO Conservation Center announced the newborn giraffe's name:  Sandy Hope, in honor of Sandy Hook victims.  Not "Grantie", but a great name nevertheless.....Hope is synonymous with our Granty for sure.

One happy fan....(yes, I need to get her more Cardinals
gear when I'm in St. Louis this weekend!)

Season Opener

Play ball!

Tonight was the official Opening Day of the MLB season, and the Cardinals are in Arizona for the first series of the season (their only series in AZ).  The 7:10pm start time of the St. Louis-Arizona game tonight was pretty late for a season opener (dang ESPN), so I planned a special Opening Day "picnic" for Alexa.  We enjoyed a light dinner (Alexa had a little bout with a stomach bug last night) on a beach towel, and it was highlighted with some Cracker Jack for dessert.  Dinner was long-over by the time the baseball game started, but Alexa made it through the third inning before her interest in the game waned.  Her stomach bug reappeared in the bottom of the 4th inning, coincidentally when the game started to go downhill for the Cards.....oh well, 161 games to go.

We have tickets to tomorrow night's Cardinals game (6:40 pm start), so we'll play it by ear to see if we'll be there in person to cheer on St. Louis.  Regardless of whether we make it to the game in AZ, I am extremely excited to be at the Home Opener in St. Louis next Monday...it should be a great time!

A St. Louis girl at heart...with a yogurt-covered shirt.